APRIL FOOL'S DAY, CAFFREY STYLE
by peppe1951
Summary: Summary: It's the first of April and according to tradition Neal takes it upon himself to pull one grand April Fool's trick on the White Collar division but finds out that they aren't the only ones who are pranked that day. Disclaimer: White Collar belong to USA Network I only write about it. I would like to thank Miss MaryAnn for betaeing this story.


**APRIL FOOL'S DAY, CAFFREY STYLE**

(A belated April Fool's story)

By Peppe1951

**Summary:** It's the first of April and according to tradition Neal takes it upon himself to pull one grand April Fool's trick on the White Collar division but finds out that they aren't the only ones who are pranked that day. **Disclaimer:** White Collar belong to USA Network I only write about it.

I would like to thank Miss MaryAnn for betaeing this story.

**Chapter 1**

Neal had been working on his plan for several days and it was finally complete the day before April 1st and he was ready to trick the agents at the White Collar division, especially his surrogate father, Peter. He had wanted to do something to commemorate the day and have a little fun at his co-workers expense. He had been surfing the net a few days earlier and had read about an exceptional prank but wanted to make it his own by changing the ingredients and now he was ready.

April Fool's Day had finally arrived and Neal excitedly rushed to the bakery to get the dozen donuts. He had requested that the donuts be filled with his own special fillings and that he would personally pick them up. He arrived as the bakery was opening, picked up the box, and headed for the FBI office to sneak it into the break room and wait for the explosions to occur as soon as the donuts were eaten. He walked in with the other agents and casually took his "treat" (the only safe one) and left the rest of them in the break room. He knew that the other agents would make a beeline to the rest of the donuts when they saw him enjoying his.

It only took Peter a moment to head to the break room and several other agents followed on his heels. Peter got the donut filled with crème and mayonnaise while Clinton got the deviled ham donut and Diane got the one with lemon and mustard, but it was when Hughes bit into the hot pepper and strawberry filled one that Neal realized that he had gone too far.

"CAFFREY!"

All eyes turned to look at the CI who was trying his best not to burst into laughter.

"Sir?"

"Get your butt up here! NOW!" Hughes wasn't happy. He abhorred hot foods and he had just bitten into what he thought was a sweet filled donut only to find his mouth ablaze as he tried to spit out the burning filling. He knew who had pulled the trick, in fact there was only one possible individual who would even try to pull something like that off and he was going to make him pay…big time.

By the time Neal arrived at Hughes' office, he had successfully removed any signs of his mirth from his features and entered the room with hopes of saving his butt.

"You wanted me sir?"

"I supposed you had no idea that those donuts contained unusual fillings, like the ones Peter, Diana and Clifton are trying to rid their mouths of, or mine which contained some type of hot pepper mixed with strawberry?"

Neal just shook his head. After all, he assured himself, he couldn't be accused of lying since he didn't actually say anything.

"I dislike hot foods and my mouth is now burning. Once I discover for certain who did this their butt will be burning, too."

Neal hurried to the refrigerator in hopes of finding something to cool off both Hughes' mouth and temper, pulled out a carton of milk that he gave him with the most sincere expression he could come up with.

"Try this sir," he said, as handed the milk to him. "Milk is supposed to cool the mouth after eating hot peppers."

Hughes' face was as red as a beet and was still choking from the heat of the filling and gratefully took a swallow only to spit it out once he realized that the milk was spoiled. He looked at the date on the carton and bellowed, "This should have been thrown out a week ago…it is spoiled. What are you trying to do Caffrey, poison me?"

"I…I…didn't know, sir. I was only trying to help you…to treat your burning mouth."

"Peter, find out who brought the donuts and then bring him," Reece said while glaring at Neal, "or her to me for disciplinary action."

"Yes, sir." Peter hurriedly emptied the donuts into a bag before taking the box they came in to the lab to be checked for fingerprints.

While waiting for the fingerprints to be run Peter viewed the security surveillance cameras that lined the front entrance of the White Collar division and watched as Neal entered. He was among a group of other agents and Peter couldn't see if he was carrying anything. He could have been but he couldn't tell for sure. Maybe I can trick the truth out of Neal, Peter thought, as he called for Neal to come up to his office.

"Neal, everyone saw you eating a donut; I presume that the donut came from the box that was in the break room?"

Neal nodded and waited for Peter's interrogating techniques to continue.

"How is it that you got the only one that was not tampered with?"

"Just lucky, I guess."

"NEAL! Don't lie to me!"

"I'm not, I just picked one and it was filled with strawberry. It was delicious."

Peter gave him an intimidating glare as he thought about how to phrase his next question. "Was there anything different about the box that might have alerted you that it might be an April Fool's gag?"

Neal shook his head again.

Peter was about to ask another question when his desk phone rang. It was the fingerprint lab, calling to report that they couldn't find any prints on the box.

"You stay here; I'll be back," he said as he started to get up and report to Hughes his lack of any new evidence tying Neal to the prank. A moment later his phone rang again and he sat back down.

"Burke." It was El and he eased back in his chair and relaxed. Just hearing his wife's loving voice grounded and comforted him.

"Honey, the strangest thing just happened. I saw someone that looked a lot like Neal leaving the Mad Hatter's Bakery about an hour ago. You are familiar with that bakery, that's the one that my friend Julia Stevens own. They boast of being able to fill any order no matter how strange or large. Well this morning they had an order for filled donuts with the strangest fillings…one filling was a mustard and lemon mix while another was hot strawberry and another was a mayonnaise flavored vanilla but the kicker was the one filled with devil ham. It had to be an April Fool's joke and while I didn't see him well enough to be absolutely sure it was Neal, it is too much of a coincidence to believed that anyone else would order deviled ham filled donuts."

"It was Neal, because those donuts were left in our break room and Reece got the strawberry one and you know how much he hates hot and spicy foods. He's out for blood…Neal's blood."

Neal looked sick when he heard that and wondered if he could make a getaway before it got worse and stood up only to be told..."Sit back down Neal, you aren't going anywhere, you have an appointment with Hughes. I'll talk to you later Hun, and I'll bring what's left of Neal home with me…love you, too."

**Chapter 2**

After hanging up Peter asked Neal, "You want to confess now and hope that Reece is in the forgiving mood?"

Neal nodded and stood to accompany Peter to Hughes' office, his head hanging low. It was all Peter could do not to laugh out loud; his surrogate son looked like he was going to his doom.

They walked together as they made their way to Hughes' office and entered a minute later. "Sir, Neal has something to tell you?"

Hughes turned his grim and stern expression on Neal and waited.

"It was me, I brought the doctored donuts for an April Fool's gag; but I swear I didn't know they were going to make that hot strawberry filling so hot that it would cause you discomfort," confessed Neal as he stood in front of Hughes' desk like a naughty school boy awaiting his punishment.

"I see…and are you ready to accept any punishment I deem appropriate for this gag?"

"Yes, sir."

"Go back to your desk while I decide your punishment."

Neal nodded and left the office, worried about what Hughes was planning to do to him.

Reece waited until he saw that Neal had seated himself back at his desk before turning to Peter with a smile, "How many donuts do we have left?

Catching on quickly, Peter replied with a smile, "All but the ones that you, Clifton, Diana and I ate and the one Neal ate that wasn't doctored, so there are seven donuts left."

"Would you mind bringing them up here on a plate? I think Neal's punishment will be to finish those donuts…but first make sure they are the doctored ones."

"Yes, sir. It will be pleasure. Should I also bring the spoiled milk?"

"Nope I think the donuts will be punishment enough."

Reece waited until Peter had returned with a plate of four donuts. "I chose four of the seven for Neal to eat…one each of devil's ham, mayonnaise, mustard and hot strawberry. I think they will make the right impression on why this was not a good idea and why it would be wise not to do it again."

Reece nodded in agreement before he called Neal to come back to his office.

"Sir?"

"Will you come up to my office…I've decided on your punishment."

"Yes, sir."

Peter had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing at Neal's expression as he came into Hughes' office again. He looked utterly dejected. He knew he was in for some serious discomfort.

"Neal, I've decided that the only punishment suitable for your prank is for you to ingest these four donuts and rest assured, they are from the box you brought to work this morning."

Neal took one look at the plate before turning back to Hughes to ask, "Can I talk to Peter for a moment first?"

Hughes nodded and waited.

"Peter, can we work out a compromise?"

"Like what?"

"I eat one donut and you tear my butt up?"

"Sorry Neal, if it was only me that got pranked I would take you up on your request but you also pranked Clifton, Diana and Reece. If your practical joke hadn't included Reece I would have punished you but this is Reece's decision and I can't change it."

"Sir, can't you spank me instead?"

Hughes looked shocked momentarily, before turning to Peter with a raised eye brow and he asked, "So that is how you punish him?"

Peter nodded. "It works pretty well most of the time."

"Keep it up, but for this punishment he has to eat the donuts."

"I agree, but could we just let him eat two donuts?"

Hughes thought it over before nodding. "I agree…Neal you have to eat only two of the four…choose well because you will have to finish both of them in front of Peter and me."

"I'd rather take the spanking instead."

"You could take the spanking plus eating the donuts if you don't stop arguing."

Neal turned at once and grabbed one of the donuts and bit into it, knowing that if he didn't he would be in worse trouble than he was already in. Neal's expression told them at once that he had bit into the devil's ham one but he finished it quickly before grabbing the next, which unfortunately contained the hot strawberry filling. He coughed it down as his face turned red from the heat of the hot pepper before shooting out of the office to try and cool his mouth off at the nearest water fountain. He stayed bent over, gulping the cold water, until he felt the heat reduce a bit. As he straightened up he saw Peter standing at his side holding the unfinished donut.

'I…I can't eat that…it's too hot," his whining grating on both Peter and Hughes' nerves.

'EAT IT CAFFREY!" The shout came from Hughes as he looked down sternly from the walkway outside of his office.

Neal reluctantly took another bite before finding himself back at the water fountain and this continued until the donut was consumed.

"You can return to your desk now; I hope you have learned never to do anything like this again?"

"Yes, sir."

The rest of the day moved slowly, but finally the day was over, and remembering his promise to his wife Peter brought Neal home for supper.

"Neal, El has been working hard on this supper and I know you will like it. She asked specifically for you to come."

"I always look forward to El's meals; you are so lucky to have someone like her in your life."

"I agree…"

El fixed Cornish hens for Neal plus his favorite side dishes and Neal filled up on the good food as well as the love and companionship that Peter and El offered so freely to him. He always felt like he was at home whenever he visited the Burke's home.

"Now for dessert, I prepared something light that I know you will like," El said as she brought out a plate with a single donut on it. "I got a dozen filled from the Mad Hatter's Bakery."

Neal took one look at the donut before he started to turn green at the thought of having to eat it but was startled when Peter and El shouted,

"April Fool's"

**The End.**


End file.
